Spiritual Formation 10/12/2021 10:12:00 PM Ann Toy

JESUS WANTED MORE THAN A FANCY MEAL

These are words that have been repeating in my mind a lot lately. For a sports dietitian working in collegiate athletics, the three weeks of fall preseason training leading up to the start of the academic school year are arguably the most daunting, physically demanding, and emotionally stressful weeks of the entire year. The hours are long, there are many, many details and logistical considerations that need to be accounted for.

I often share with non-sports dietitians that preseason feels kind of like you are responsible for hosting your entire extended family at your house for a holiday meal. But, instead of making arrangements for a single gathering as you would with a traditional holiday meal, it's more like the extended family is staying at your house and continues to roll in-and-out of the kitchen, sometimes unannounced, snacking and making a mess from sunup to sundown for three straight weeks.

What's more, beyond simply procuring the actual meals for the student-athletes, which, in and of itself is a lot of work, there are several other tasks and responsibilities that need to get done during this time frame - products need to be ordered for the school year, budgets need to be balanced, meetings with coaches, teams, and individual athletes that need to take place, and even early preparations for future team travel and competitions.

In the midst of all the chaos and stress, my default response is often to emotionally detach from the stressful situation and shift my attention and effort to enhance the process instead of the people that are right in front of me. By doing this, admittedly, I am able to check a lot more boxes, and get the work done in a more timely and efficient manner. However, in these moments, even with the most efficient systems and processes in place, at the end of the day I still find myself exhausted and nearing burn out. I'm frustrated and resentful toward others, I lack patience with my family, and can't help but recognize feelings of emptiness and a sense of unfulfillment in the mission of loving and serving this population of student-athletes that I've been called to.

This is not the first time I've wrestled with my tendency to hyper-focus on performance, productivity, and accomplishing the task before me. When I find myself spinning in circles and getting consumed by the details of my work, I know it's time to reorient my priorities. The passage in scripture that has been my go-to in these seasons of life is the story of two sisters, Martha and Mary, in Luke 10:38-42.

In this story, we are introduced to Martha and Mary, two Christian believers who, albeit unexpectedly, welcome Jesus and the disciples into their home. The text says that Martha was busy with all the preparations that needed to be made for their honored guests. When I read this, it's not hard for me to imagine the overwhelming stress and sense of responsibility that Martha must have been feeling as she promptly shifts her focus and attention to the tasks and details necessary to host what she hoped would be an enjoyable, thoughtful, and "successful" meal or gathering.

Both Martha and Mary were good people, they each wanted to do the right thing. Both women loved Jesus, and he loved them. But in this passage, Jesus himself makes a distinction between these two followers of his - not a distinction of worth or identity or status, but he just points out the obvious. Martha was "distracted with much serving" and Jesus himself says to her, "You are anxious and troubled with many things, but one thing is needed." On the contrary, Mary knew what that one necessity was. She sat at the Lord's feet and listened to him. She was captivated by him. All she wanted was more of the Lord himself. And Jesus said about her, "Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

In this passage, the word better really sticks out to me. It implies that it's not an either/or situation. Martha didn't do anything "bad" or "wrong", in fact, her desire to serve, be hospitable, and offer Jesus a comfortable and enjoyable experience in her home is a good thing! Instead, what I glean from this story is that it's more a matter of priorities. The pastors at our church often remind us that we're about Jesus, Community, and Mission - in that order of priority. When we get our priorities wrong, when we allow even good things to consume all of our time, attention, and effort, we lose touch with Jesus and his calling on our lives. We start to lose track of what we're doing and why we're even doing it (aka mission). This is called wandering; my friends, and we're very prone to it!

I believe that, in this text, Jesus wanted Martha (and us?!) to realize two important things: First, that being his disciple is the first priority. We should be deliberately creating time and space for God and constantly inviting him into our work, relationships, and every other aspect of our lives. Second, Jesus gently draws attention to the fact that Martha was "worried and upset about many things." Martha's desire to be a superb hostess caused her anxiety, hard feelings toward her sister, and an outburst toward Jesus. As believers in Christ, when we find ourselves relying on our own strength to advance our own agendas, there is inevitable exhaustion, bitterness, and disappointment that awaits us.

So, in those hard moments when I'm feeling stressed and disconnected as a result of the "many things" that need to get done, I'm now able to shift my perspective. Fancy meals are wonderful. They are a good thing, but they're also very short-lived. Jesus wants more than to be the one-time guest of honor at a fancy meal; he simply wants time with his friends. He wanted to know them and be with them. Jesus wants to be our sole source of nourishment all the time and in every circumstance.

As I continue through this busy season working in college athletics and in my own personal life, I'm constantly asking myself these questions:

Where in my life can I deliberately create space for God to do what only he can do?
What does it look like for God to do his work through my hands?

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JESUS WANTED MORE THAN A FANCY MEAL